Analysing Mallika Akbar’s statement on Pallavi Gogoi’s Washington Post article.
Mrs Akbar is a renowned Psychoanalyst. She is considered ethical and dependable by many. There is no reason not to believe Mallika Akbar. However, while Mrs Akbar may be a victim of infidelity she is not the main victim/survivor of this story.
In the way Malika Akbar has positioned her narrative she has clearly come out in support of Mr Akbar. She hasn’t disclosed Akbar’s other exploitative tales. We wonder why! Does she really not know about any of them? Why has she remained silent on the other #MeToo stories against MJ Akbar! Is it because she believes they are true?
Mallika Akbar understands language well, deals with trauma every now and then in her profession and thus its important to call out her misogyny.
1) Mallika Akbar says Pallavi Gogoi caused unhappiness and “discord in our home”? Why doesn’t she say “Akbar and Pallavi caused discord in my/our home” or better still “AKBAR caused me pain”?
2) What kind of a person believes that a 40 plus husband is not responsible for his affairs but his 22 year old junior colleague is responsible for hurting her family ?
3) “…in her public display of affection in my presence. In her flaunting the relationship , she caused anguish and hurt to my entire family”- Really are you talking about a 20 something here? You make her sound like your husband’s equal! Was she his equal in that office? Could she have shown affection if your husband had not encouraged it? What is Mrs Akbar’s problem with the PDA? The fact that her husband cheated on her or the PDA?
4) “At an Asian Age party at home crowded by young journalists I have watched with mortification and pain as they have danced together”- However, painful that may be Ma’am and my heart goes out to you it doesn’t explain what was exactly happening between Akbar and Gogoi. He was the editor, he chose to dance with her in his house, you were mortified….what makes you certain that she was extremely comfortable? If you one of the biggest psychoanalysts of the country and the wife watched it all silently why do you feel Gogoi a twenty two year old should have reacted like a “VICTIM”? Did you react like one? Because you are one too! Right?
5) When you confronted MJ he decided to prioratize family! How? and why? What made him sensitive to you suddenly? or did he just send her away to a place where he could prey on her better?
6) “Happily drinking and dining with us”- yes just like you were happily drinking and dining with them…and also feeling multiple things! Weren’t you?
7) “Neither carried the haunted look of the victim”- This one Mrs Akbar is shameful and shallow coming from you. Considering you must be dealing with trauma every now and then in your profession tell us- What is that “victim look” that everyone else and now you are asking for?
Stereotyping a victim look…this is what it has come to finally?! Right?